Meet Sophia

Thank you God for bringing this child into our lives.  She is absolutely beautiful.  More on Sophia in a moment.  Let me bring you up to speed on how we got here.  On Tuesday afternoon we picked up the referral from the SDA. From downtown Kyiv, we went back to our apartment to pack up as we are moving to Simferopol down in Crimea.  Our facilitator picked us up and we were driven to the train station in downtown to purchase our tickets.  With tickets in hand we headed to platform 10, almost 9-3/4.  Lisa and I wanted to reenact the scene from Harry Potter but our facilitator was all business and wanted to get our butts on the train.  I've also been told a few times not to talk to people.  I understand his concern, but I can't be quiet, even with a language barrier.  The train ride was 14 hours long and we left at 8:16pm on Tuesday and arrived around 10 the next morning in Simferopol.  The overnight train ride is definitely a cool part of the travel and an interesting setting in the story, but it's REALLY hard to sleep on a train.  Especially when you are going to meet your daughter for the first time the next day.  Yeah, there were a few thoughts going through my head that night.  We were met by our primary driver, Yevgeny and we promptly went to the local orphan director to present our referral from Kyiv and get permission on a local level to visit the orphanage.  Very quick meeting, she asked us what we did, how long have we been married, how difficult will the adjustment be adding a daughter to the mix.  Side note, every time we tell someone that we have three boys, their eyes immediately point to heaven and comments like боже мой  (my goodness!) comes out.  With the local approval, we went to a local notary to fill out some adoption paperwork to get the ball rolling.  

After that, we headed to the orphanage.  It was...exciting...nerve racking.  Let me put it this way, when you're pregnant and in the delivery room, you are filled with all kinds of anticipation.  Our prayers to this point had been that we would be all that she needs and wants in parents.  I personally was concerned about what she would think and feel. When we pulled onto the grounds of the orphanage several children were playing in a creek under the bridge. As we wound our way in further, we were looking for a familiar face.  Some of these children came over last year during the hosting program, but more importantly we had blinders on looking for a face to put with the picture on our fridge.  We pulled up to the school building and were met by Gulia on the front steps. After a few hugs and smiles we walk inside and there we are told more about Sophia's background. Basically, she is a great student and a healthy child.  As we are talking, in walks Sophia.  It was a goosebump adrenaline spiking moment.  If there had not been other people in the room, this might have evoked a tear.  Our facilitator translated for us as we began to tell Sophia how we came to know about her and what our family is like.  Lisa made a photo album that has pictures of us doing all kinds of things together and it includes the larger extended family as well.  It was in this first meeting that it was made clear to us that she wants to stay in touch with her father.

We were told Sophia knew we were coming, but the reality of the moment started to sink in...for all of us.  At one point it looked as if this was overwhelming her.  I know it was for us.  Her eyes were full of tears, though none fell.  It is clear in talking with her, that she has a strong connection with her father, even though he no longer has parental rights.  We explained to her that we don't want her to lose that connection.

The remainder of our first visit was spent walking around the orphanage doing our best to ask questions about her current life.  We showed her all the pictures we had on both iPhones and a few videos we had made.  One is of the boys saying "hi" to Sophia, the other is a video of Easter morning in the Davis house.  We found out her favorite colors are purple and green. We had a few moments of laughter.  We felt good about our first visit, but tomorrow was going to be a new day.  We were going to meet her father.  This is a HUGE meeting as he has no legal sway, but he can sway her.

Today's meeting was all about building a relationship and trust with the father...in about 2 hours...so he could bless this adoption.  The language barrier is getting easier to deal with each day. Our facilitator even joked that he won't be able to speak in front of me anymore because I'll understand.  That's a big stretch, because without the pee pee dance, I'm not sure I could ask where the bathroom is correctly.  Yesterday we got settled into our new apartment which has AC!!! but no internet.  No worries.  Last night's sleep for me was restless.  You'd think after the train ride I would fall dead to the world.  Not so much.  I could not stop thinking about Sophia and what this looks like from her end.  The shear courage this takes.  Yes, she will gain a future, but that is an unknown and untouchable idea.  She knows what the orphanage has.  And she knows that she will be moving far away from her father.  Right now, she gets to see him off and on during weekends.  What would I say to the father?  How would Sophia act with us and her father there?  Well, all my late night thinking got me was little sleep for a day that turned out to be a blessing.  Her father is an older man, in his sixties and he showed up with pictures for us of Sophia as a little girl.  It is evident in the pictures what her living conditions were, but it is also evident that he cares for her and that is an awesome blessing.  Sophia was very easy going today and had lots of smiles.  At one point during our visit her teacher came over and I wish I was filming or recording what she said, it was so filled with love and adoration for this little girl.  The Russian language has a way of coming across as harsh, just watch the first five minutes of Hunt for Red October.  But it has a beautiful softer side that when people speak from the heart, you can almost comprehend the language.  This teacher was definitely sorry to lose Sophia, but happy she was gaining a family.  All Lisa and I could do was smile and laugh.  We spent close to two hours with Sophia and her father talking about the family’s past. What he did for a living.  Where he’s traveled.  How Sophia would play around his ranch, his words not mine.  There is apparently a grandmother who lives way off in Moscow, but he didn’t know where for sure.  The father brought apricots from a tree in his yard and shared those with us.  I may have serious bowel movements later this evening, but I did not want to offend him and did what I needed to at the moment.

The father and I had a little side chat and I explained that we want Sophia to be happy and safe.  We got his home address and his mobile number for her to be able to call him from NC.

When I looked back at Lisa, I could not see her.  It was like throwing bread in Central Park.  Lisa was making lanyards with the kids and it doesn’t take long before they all show up.  It was really cool to see Dima, Rostik, Vova, and Vitalik from last year’s hosting program.  Next thing I hear Lisa screaming my name as there were about 48 little hands gathering around her.

The logistics of what is left to do is as follows.  The court is graciously going to accept our application for adoption without the approval from Kyiv.  This is good news as it cuts out about a week of time in the process.  Simultaneously, our facilitator is headed back to Kyiv to submit the application for adoption there as well.  Don’t try to follow the process or map it out, it’s impossible to understand without suffering through it.  We are still slated to finish up around Aug 8^th, but that date can’t be confirmed until we have an actual court date.  Our date to return home is based on that event.  For now, we are satisfied with spending time with our daughter.  Tomorrow we are going to paint toenails.  Oddly enough, I’m looking forward to it.  At the end of the day Sophia came and gave us hugs, which was unexpected, but much needed, welcomed, and it felt great.  I can’t wait to see what these toes look like when I’m finished!