Surprise and the infinity plus million hug

Here we come boys!

I have not been updating the blog as we were traveling back to the states to see our boys. Just in case my oldest was following along, I did not want to spoil the surprise. It worked!

We woke up Friday morning at 3:30 to the most wonderful smell, сырники (sirniki)! I wish I could describe this awesome dish. It's kinda like cheese cake cooked in the pan. Thank you Lena and Chess for the wonderful dinner the day before, the great conversation late into the night, and HUGE THANKS for breakfast in the morning! I am so excited that y'all are finally starting your adoption journey in Ukraine after two years of setbacks, heart brakes, and random delays. We are praying for a boring, straightforward process from here on out.

Our new driver showed up at 4am and whisked us away to a very busy airport. We were anxious to get the journey home started. Our return flights were on time and the longest layover was 3 hours in the US as we had to go through customs. This made it as relatively painless as it could be. We were met at the Raleigh airport by our good friend Karen with red, white, and blue Hawaiian leis. Thank you Karen! We arrived back home and we were greeted by the rest of her new expanded family. So very cool to see and hear their new son Daniel Ruslan Kochies! We quickly settled into the house, turning the AC, the water pump, and water heater back on. We got unpacked, sorted mail (it's amazing how much junk mail we get), found a few checks and got into the truck to get something to eat. Sleep came fast and hard that night. We actually slept in a bit and woke up with a sleep hangover.

We had coordinated with Luda's host family to go visit her in Charlotte before we headed north to see our boys. We weren't sure when we might see her again and we wanted to take advantage of the opportunity. So glad we did. Luda is "exploding" with joy and is having a great time with her host family. We called Sophia and let Luda talk with her. In typical teenager fashion she quickly takes the phone and settles into a long conversation. We had to get the phone back after 15 minutes as I'm sure they would have talked for hours...$$$! We said she could talk to her again on Thursday from the zoo.

We left Charlotte and drove to Christiansburg to meet my folks for dinner. It was quick, but felt good to chat with them and share some of Sophia's pictures from her childhood. We also got to share a lot more background information that we don't put here. They are excited to see their new granddaughter.

Adam really missed us!

From there we started the long trek north. We broke it up into two days, staying the night in Scranton, PA. We finally made it to Lisa's sister's house around 4pm and went inside to get our long overdue hugs. Alex was the first to see us and says to Lisa, "What are you doing here?" and then quickly jumps in her arms. Adam came around the corner and backed up a little falling down, then quickly gets back up and gives me a great infinity plus a million hug. I don't think he let go of me for a good five minutes. He was so happy and it felt good to hold him in my arms. I missed this more than I had imagined.


This morning we had our usual morning cuddles and wrestling. I can't wait to mix in our daughter!

Raw emotions...

I didn’t have a chance to update the blog as we had court late in the afternoon.  So the day started with us waking up late, maybe 6:15 in the morning.  We didn’t really get much sleep that night.  We had court on our mind, Sophia, our boys, Sophia, travel itineraries, and Sophia.  We took our time getting ready.   We packed the suitcases, put away all the electronics and chargers, washed dishes, and showered.  Well the apartment has an instantaneous water heater that uses gas.  It takes a few tries to keep it going and each time it lights up, there is a small explosion.  Slightly unnerving, but after 3 weeks, we were used to it.  Today for my shower, it decided not to work at all.  The water coming out of the tap is cold.  So I took a shower that was very cold.  I have a much greater appreciation for the showers the children take.  After breakfast we headed over to our favorite little bakery for chocolate croissants.  We then passed the time with cards and reading.  Our facilitator was coming in on the overnight train and he came over around 11am to shower.  Well, he was not so fond of the cold shower and promptly cranked up the gas volume being fed to the unit.  When he turned the shower on, we were sitting in the other room (there were only two in the apartment), the ensuing explosion was not small.  It shook the apartment!  But mind you the water coming out was now close to 110F.  It’s HOT!  So as you throttle the temperature down, the gas heater shuts off.  So you hear the Russian exclamations of, which I imagine to be HOLY COW THIS WATER IS COLD!  He turns the water off and back on.  Again, another apartment shaking explosion!  At this point, I turned on the exhaust fan over the stove to vent as much gas as possible…just in case.  In reality, I’m sure the flue pipe was becoming a flame thrower each time he turned the water on.

We survived and we all headed out to grab a bite to eat for lunch.  After lunch, we stopped by the orphanage so our facilitator could coordinate something with the director.  We took the time to go pop in and see Sophia.  She had on her shirt, but did not have the shorts on.  Good thing, as they are white and would have probably gotten a little dirty waiting.  She was headed over for her lunch so we got our hugs and she was off.  We headed back to the apartment to change into our court clothes as it’s way too hot to walk around in those.  Then we were off to court.  We were there about 45 minutes early and we waited down in the lobby.  I call it a lobby, it’s more like a 10x15 room with a bench and a desk with a copier on it.  The front door was open, which was no big deal as the building is not air conditioned.  So we waited on the bench with arms spread out so as to increase ventilation as much as possible.  About 30 minutes later Sophia came in with the orphanage director.  She looked beautiful and smiled when she saw us and took a seat between us.  We showed her pictures of what her friends have been doing back in the states, which helped to pass the time as we waited until 3:30.

At 3:30, we went upstairs to the courtroom outside the judge’s chamber.  The courtroom we were waiting in had a holding cell, which kind of added a little drama to the scene.  Thankfully this is not where the proceedings were held.  About 15 minutes later, we were invited into the air conditioned office of the judge.  As we took our seats, they turned the AC off.  WHAT?!  No please keep it on, I’m dying here with this tie, long sleeve shirt, pants, and SOCKS!  I have only worn socks 3 times over the past month and my feet were hot!  At least it was cool at the start, but got warmer quickly as there were 12 people in the office.  The process is basically, a preliminary hearing, the hearing, and then the debates.  This took about 1.5 hours.  I can handle, though I’m not real comfortable with, my personal information being shared with complete strangers.  Knowing the why I’m there, helped.  But still, there are 9 complete strangers in Ukraine, that now know where we live, what our house is like, what our education and jobs are, and how much we make in a years time.  The hard part in this part of the process was hearing about Sophia’s past.  Your background and status as well as hers is recounted three times during the proceeding.  I can handle mine and Lisa hers.  Sophia on the other hand had to listen to where she came from, how she ended up in the orphanage, why she is still there, where her living relatives are and that they want nothing to do with her…three times.  And at one point, a question was asked as to why Sophia was still there.  I’m pretty sure I heard it the first two times, but I guess they felt the need to hammer it home that nobody wanted Sophia.  That hurts.  It hurt me, and it visibly shook our daughter.  Sophia was asked to give testimony regarding her status and whether she wanted to be adopted.  The first two times she said yes.  She was asked about the relationship she had with us, good.  She was asked what she thought about being adopted, she said it will be hard to leave.  The third time she was asked if she wanted to be adopted she said yes, but then she was asked to describe why she wants to be adopted.  At this point, it was too much.  She could not keep it together anymore.  Thankfully the orphanage director quickly consoled her and comforted her, but she would not look up anymore.  This court proceeding has brought all the emotions over the last three weeks to the surface.  It is really happening.  This is when it truly hits her and us that she is leaving her home in hopes of a better life.   I can imagine we will go through a grieving process back in the states similar to that of losing a loved one.  Why did she get chosen out of all the children at the orphanage?  Why now?  Who’s going to look after her father or her friends?  So many questions that she may not fully accept or comprehend that we will have to deal with when we bring her home.  Yet at the same time, she did give us hugs after the verdict was read.

I couldn’t speak, and still get choked up when trying to get through it.  When Alex was born I just sat there and took slow breaths for about 30 minutes as I watched them clean him and run their tests on him.  I would nod or shake my head, but I could not open my mouth.  If I did, I knew I would lose it.  Sure enough, when I finally went out into the lobby to tell my mom and mother-in-law the news, I borke down into sobs.  They thought something had gone terribly wrong, so I had to resort to head shakes and nods to communicate until I could pull it together.  Same thing here, I could not speak.  Lisa had to talk for me, and she could barely keep it together.  Even with Sophia, all I could do was hold her and smile.  I was speechless.  Lisa had to call the parents and share the news.  We are elated beyond words to have Abigail Sophia Davis as our daughter.  We cannot wait to get her home and start the process of healing and becoming a family.  We love you Abigail Sophia Davis.

We didn’t have a chance to celebrate or even help start the process of healing because the director needed to return to the orphanage and Sophia had to go with her.  We had a little more time to get ready to catch our train, but it’s not the ending we had envisioned.  Quite frankly, it was the complete opposite.  Lisa and I shared one last pizza from the first café we ate at in Simferopol and then headed to the apartment to await our ride.  We got to the train station and caught the 8pm train to Kiev.  While I slept more on this train, I have to say I could not get my daughter out of my head.  She pervaded every thought.  Even when I would try listening to a book, my mind wandered off to Sophia.  I finally broke down and prayed that she be protected and comforted.

Today in Kiev, we stopped by the US Embassy to get some paperwork signed as Lisa will not be here when the process of applying for Sophia’s visa is finalized.  We’re also staying in the Kiev apartment with Lena and Chess who finally have received their referral to start the adoption process of their two children.  Great people, great times, awesome food (thank you Lena!), and great conversation!

Karaoke and the wave

He was determined to win.

This morning’s visit was filled with love, laughter, hugs, high fives, fist bumps, dancing, pictures, yelling, a few tears, lots of smiles, and emptiness, or a void.  I’m not sure how to describe it.  This is the last day that we will be seeing these kids at least for a week as we take some time to regroup.  Yeah, I know, I’ll see them again in about a week.  But tomorrow we have court.  They are losing one of their own to the outside world.  But we are taking a friend away from the orphanage.  Someone who cares about them.  Someone who takes time with the little ones.  Someone who is one of them.  My heart is so full of mixed emotions right now.

We arrived during an all hands on deck meeting.  I have no idea what they talked about.  After the meeting was finished they headed over to the cafeteria for breakfast.  Today’s hot meal was scalded milk with some kind of grain mixed in.  It looked like a VERY runny cream of wheat.  But think of two cups of milk to one tablespoon of grains.  They also got a cube of butter, slice of cheese, half of a thick slice of bread, a hard-boiled egg and hot chocolate.  Mmmmm!  This took them all of 5 minutes to eat.  I sat with the youngest children at the orphanage during breakfast and they were very happy to chat with me.

So yeah, today was cleanup, sweep up, and hack the weeds day.  The older boys, 11-13 get tasked with removing the taller greenery (some of it is weeds, some grass, some flowers) with shovels.  They aren’t digging the plants up to get rid of the root, they are just hacking off the plant at the base.  They were clearly not excited about doing the task.  Personally, I see no issue in getting the children to help out around the orphanage.  However, if you are going to ask for their help in keeping the place running, take the time to read to them, to play with them, to share stories of your youth with them.  Maybe a missions trip just on management training.  Hmmm.  Focus Mike.  Too many irons in the fire.  Let someone else run with it.  The younger children were given brooms and told to sweep all the flower petals off and away from the front steps of the dorm.  To help the children have fun with it, they did bring out a big speaker plugged into a laptop and played music.

Sophia and Lisa went upstairs to try on the outfits and other clothes we had to see if any of them could be put together to create at least one outfit for court.  SUCCESS!  They found one pair of pants and a shirt that fit.  Woohoo!  We did buy her a pair of size 10 pants here that fit in the waist but are too short in the length. We brought a pair of size 12 jeans that were too big in the waist, but also too short in the length.  Oh boy.  We’ll figure this out when we get back to the states, but suffice it to say, we’re stickin with shorts until she can try on the pants.

The wave!

By the time they came back downstairs I was in full song and dance with some of the other kids, which means I would recite the lyrics I knew and bob my head.  No gettin jiggy with it!  We spent the rest of the time listening to music.  Watching various types of acrobatic tricks being performed by Sasha.  He’s a great kid and would no doubt test the limits of authority, but I also know that he’s got my back and that partnership would carry through a lot of strife.  I will pray for him as he approaches graduation in the next year or two.  Somewhere in the middle of all this, Lisa grabbed a couple and taught them how to do the wave with their arms.   This is an 80’s break dance move and it was hilarious to watch her teach and then all of them try it.  The cool part, they smiled.  I don’t know how it started but one of the little guys grabbed my hand and motioned for us to arm wrestle.  So for the next 5 guys in line, I arm wrestled and they boys got progressively bigger.  I didn’t win any as after about a minute or two, Lisa would grab the hands and pull them down for the boy.  Again, the cool part, they smiled.

I showed Sophia the messages from her friends and she was excited to read them and promptly got busy writing her replies.  So cool.  She got so excited to see the pictures and read their messages back.  We also handed out a few other items we had with us.  Little Maxim needed a new pair of sandals, so we got him some.  Another little freckled boy, named Victor, also needed some new sandals and shorts.  Done, I hope they help and don’t become a bargaining chip or taken.

As time was up, we said our goodbye’s and started walking.  We tried to explain what tomorrow would look like, but we couldn’t.  We have been told we have court and that it will happen at 2:30.  We have already had it pushed back from 10am to 2:30 and we have a suspicion why, but it’s not worth explaining here.  However, we do not want any further delays, who does.  We told Sophia that we will come to get her tomorrow and will not be visiting in the morning.  We plan to go to dinner after court. And lastly, while I have showed Sophia various messages on the translator, I have not spoken the words I love you to her.  So down on one knee I looked at her and said, “I love you.” and she replied “Я то же.”  That was the best hug I have gotten thus far on this trip.

Crimea in a day

Sitting in front of some flowers, and a lady posing on the monument
in shorts that are way too short.

We did not visit the orphanage today.  We had asked if we could take a side trip down to Yalta, a beach town here in Crimea.  The usual answer we get to these kinds of questions is, why?  Because we’ve been here for dang near four weeks and the only sight seeing has been a short trip to downtown Kiev.  That ain’t gonna cut it.  I want to be able to share in my daughter’s culture and language.  I can’t learn that staring at four walls.  So to get out and see the country side, we took off for Yalta.  We, actually our guide, called Sophia to let her know that we would not be coming to see her today and that we were going to try and find her new clothes that didn’t include a dress or a skirt.  She was happy and said she missed us.  I miss you too sweetheart.

Our first stop was a botanical garden.  It has flowers and trees.  Inside the botanical garden, they have a butterfly room.  We had a couple of butterflies land on us for pictures.  Next stop was a winery.  Massandra.  The winery was a pretty cool stop.  We went on a tasting.  Basically we all sit at tables with about 9 different wines.  One is dry, the rest are dessert wines and the last one is 75 years old.  This last one could be purchased for $175.  Here’s a thought, knock $170 off the price and you probably would have sold out 74 years ago.  But it certainly makes for a great story, just not gonna end up on my shelf.

They just walk right on to your hand.

Next we headed out of Yalta along the cost towards Sevastopol.  Along the way we stopped for lunch at a hillside restaurant that had beautiful views of the Black Sea.  After lunch, we continued on our circuitous route back to Simferopol.  We arrived back at our apartment at just before 5pm.  We needed water for the apartment so we headed over to the grocery store.  Between our apartment and the store are dozens of clothing stores so we went in to each trying to find a new outfit for Sophia to wear to court on Wednesday.  No luck.  They only have women’s sizes.  We were just about to call it a night when we got a call from some new friends of ours.  They offered to pick us up and take us to a pizza joint, Pesto’s Pizza (I think), and then drive us out to a Sam’s type store and see if we could find something there.  Dinner was great, the company was even better.  We met them at church on Sunday and hit it off immediately.  They too are going through the adoption process, but they live in Ukraine and have been here for 7 years.  They are translating the bible into Crimean Tartar, a local language.  This couple is super cool and a must meet for anyone coming over.  Definitely two people I will include in my prayer list.  They are adopting two older boys.  We found two different outfits that we think will work great for court.  We are excited to show them to her tomorrow.

All in all, today was another great day and we are thankful for His provisions.

Наш Бог как велик!

Happy parents-to-be!

This morning we had the opportunity to attend church here in Simferopol.  We were fortunate to make it to church this morning as we got on the trolleybus that has the same number as the minibus.  We figured they went the same way.  Wrong!  So we hopped off and made our way back to the correct bus after a 15 minute detour and still had one minute to spare.  There were two sermons today, one in English, and the other in Russian.  The English sermon was given by one of the folks from Ohio, who happens to be a youth pastor.  It was a layman’s version of how bad do you want to be a Christian.  The service was similar to the ones we attend back in Raleigh.  Worship, message, and more worship.  I love to sing and it’s hard for me to make it through the worship at home because I get so caught up in the words that I get choked up.  The effect of listening to songs in Russian is the same.  Plus, we made more friends!  I love this place.

I want to take a moment and share some thoughts on adoption and why we chose Ukraine.  First, my wife and I have always considered adopting a child, and even talked about a daughter to round out the clan.  Last year, we fell in love with a boy from Ukraine.  Not North Carolina or Virginia or Texas, but Ukraine.  We didn’t do this because we felt drawn to Ukraine or because we had heard the words of Jesus say go make disciples to all nations.  We came here because we fell in love with a boy we considered to be our son.  We didn’t ask to adopt all the children in Ukraine, nor did we impose this will on anyone else.  We just wanted the one little boy, he just happened to be Ukrainian.  He was worth all the costs we are incurring.  Financially, emotionally, and spiritually.  Could this be done cheaper?  I have no doubt the financial cost can come down.  But let me ask you this, how much would you spend to save the life of your son or daughter?  That’s the mindset that we have taken.  We continue to pray for that little boy as he did not choose to be an orphan.  He did not choose to be an orphan anymore than a child in America did.  They are equals in that regard.  They are not equals in the walls that have to be climbed to reach potential opportunities that exist for them upon leaving the orphanage.  The common denominator for both is the need for love. 

We have since fallen in love with another child, a little girl, who also just happens to be Ukrainian.  Will I advocate for orphans in America?  Absolutely.  I am 100% for adoption.  I think adoption should be a first resort to starting a family.  We didn’t go that route as a family, but I certainly did as a father.  My oldest son is biologically not related to me.  But I have loved him as if he were my own son.  He was three when I met him.  I was 26.  So you see, I don’t care if it’s America, Ukraine, Ethiopia, China, Vietnam, or Canada, adoption is always an option.  I realize I am slightly biased having done this once, per se, and we are now adopting together as a family.

This is my daughter, what more do I need to say.

This afternoon we visited Sophia and we arrived during naptime.  The caretakers actually let us go upstairs.  I guess we have earned their trust.  When Lisa poked her head in the room Sophia was just finishing getting dressed.  It would have been way cool if we could have been the ones to wake her up.  We waited in the small lobby outside her room and when she came out we went downstairs.  Now we had originally set today up to be when I would play soccer with the boys.  But since we came in the afternoon, and by then the sun had warmed up the temperature a good 30 degrees, we opted for no soccer.  We brought watermelon that we had cut into slices and offered them to any takers.  None came home.  Today’s visit was another nice opportunity to sit and play with Sophia.  We still had other children around, we almost always do, but Lisa plays with Sophia and I entertain the others.  Today, Lisa and Sophia played boxes.  This is the game where you create a grid of dots and each turn consists of connecting two dots.  The object is to draw the fourth line to create a box.  You put your initial inside and get one point.  At first, Lisa was struggling to get Sophia to understand the strategy.  Lisa would complete two sides of a box and Sophia would draw the third on her turn.  Thus leaving an open scoring opportunity for Lisa.  Lisa would ignore the obvious scoring chance and move elsewhere on the grid.  Sophia did not ignore it, she finished the box and would smile.  It’s kinda like not blocking your son’s shot on goal when playing basketball.  Again, Sophia smiled and she trounced Lisa 121 – 75.  Lisa wrote the score down under each name.  Sophia took her pen and started to write her name in English.  WOW!!  This was completely unprompted.  Lisa did ask her if she wanted to write her last name and she did.  Sophia did great.  I love this girl more everyday.  Now here’s the kicker on the game.  Lisa was playing easy on Sophia, but in the next game, Sophia versus Victor, or Витя, she was strategizing big time.  She understood the game clearly, I think she was being nice to Lisa!  After she had a comfortable lead on the second game she backed out and let someone else finish up.

Towards the end of our visit I remembered that we wanted to ask her about writing notes to her friends.  We did and she was thrilled to do this.  FYI – on the iPhone, you can add international keyboards and switch between them as needed.  Very cool feature, especially if voice recognition doesn’t work.  She would type a message for one, and I would post it on Facebook, then another, and another.  At first she wasn’t sure what to write, so we prompted with How are you?  I miss you.  It’s been quiet since you left.  Then she dove right in.  Very cool!

Victor and Achmed, he's holding his hands to prevent him from grabbing
him.  Boys will be boys.

We’ve done a few, actually several, side trips to break up our days.  Lisa got her hair cut at a salon near our apartment.  This was an experience in hand gestures and her stylist, Leo, kept pointing to the gray in her hair asking, “Color?”  We’ve had to get pictures developed.  We eat out once or twice a week.  The new church group has been great as we had to learn the bus system.  FYI – the trolley bus costs about $0.15.  The minibus costs about $0.30.  So even with our mishap, we were out $0.30.  Ouch!  There is an Adidas store, actually there are two (one of each side of the street), that has been running a 50% off sale.  When a pair of sandals normally costs $20 and they have them at half off, we didn’t pass up the opportunity.  We bought a couple pairs for some of the children in the orphanage.  If they will let me, I will snap a photo of how far they will wear a pair of shoes out, it tells the story.  Plus we found out today from a boy who is 15 that his birthday was July 15^th.  Well we couldn’t let that go by, so I asked him what he wanted.  He said his birthday has already passed.  I said you’re right, now what do you want for you birthday.  At first he said I don’t know, then he said shorts.  You got it, buddy.  I’ve also gotten to play and hang out with another older boy, who if I had to guess, is also in the 15-16 yr old range.  I will pray for him as he graduates in the next year or so.  Lastly, we love shopping at the central market.  If you really want to learn Russian fast, go there!

Alone time

Down by the river

I want to say thank you to everyone for sharing your stories and pictures of the girls as they experience love from a family.  Having seen their smiles and eyes over here, they look truly happy in North Carolina.  There is no worry, no fear of what’s next, they can just be kids.  Something we all think back to in our own memories, be it a family vacation, or playing in a little league game, or just goofing around the house with friends, or sleep overs.  These are the types of memories that will have a lasting effect on their lives.  I’m praying that God opens doors and hearts for y’all.  As one family is approaching it, they are excited to see what their host child shows them.  That’s awesome!  They have a true servant’s attitude.  Enough about this, but please keep posting and sending emails as we do miss the children.  Yesterday we had the opportunity to Skype with one of the children, I love technology!

While we miss the other children very much, we are enjoying the alone time with Sophia.  We got to the orphanage, again it’s around breakfast time, so we waited outside the cafeteria for about 5 minutes thinking Sophia was inside.  She wasn’t.  She came walking down the path from the dorm so we went over and got our hugs.  Next stop was to see the doctor for her daily medication (I really can’t wait to get her home to take care of her).  Her spirits are up and she is feeling WAY better, but there are some lingering effects from the cold.  We showed her the pictures of Luda’s hair and funny earrings at Target. Side note, it might be worthwhile for someone at Target to take notice of the type of publicity they are getting through this program.  I’ll mention their name again and again and again, IF they wouldn’t mind helping the program out.  I mean, we only attend a church with 8000 people.  Plus the church of the family in Texas, Charlotte, Indiana and the thousands of people on Facebook who are reading these experiences in said states.  Maybe I’ll forward my blog to the CEO.

We shared with Sophia the pictures of Yulia and her outfits.  OMG!  I love this girl!  Her outfits rock!!!  Especially the new shoes!  LOVE IT!!  Luda looks like she was always a part of her host family (wink wink) she is fitting in so well.  Ahhh, God works miracles and the way in which these girls will find their forever family will certainly bring Him glory!  I look forward to watching, praying and participating.  I think I used enough exclamation points to hammer home how full my heart is!

We spent today talking with Sophia about the various things our family does.  For instance, here’s what I told her about our oldest son Tyler.  He likes to read.  He’s a good student.  He plays soccer and hockey.  He likes to go swimming.  He doesn’t speak Russian.  He is excited to have a sister.  He is not a mean boy and he will protect you.  Lastly, we shared with her that Tyler loves her.  During this whole exchange it was a fairly one way conversation.  Occasionally, I would get an “I understand” back.  For the most part, it was just me talking and her smiling.

For Alex, I told her that he likes to ride his bike.  Now at this she replied that she too likes to ride a bike.  I told her Adam doesn’t know how yet.  I told her that Alex likes to read his Bible and play soccer.  He likes candy A LOT.  At this one I actually said he REALLY LIKES candy, and she smiled.  I explained that the boys will wake up early and go downstairs to watch cartoons.  I told her they like to play with the water hose.

I told her I saw a picture of her on the back of a motorcycle and asked her if she liked it.  She said no.  Bummer.  We may have to try again as it may not have been a Harley.  I told her that Alex likes to pretend he’s an airplane on the back and hold his arms out.  My big seven-year old has no fear, which scares the dickens out of us sometimes.   I told her that I like playing with my sons and I like playing with her.  Her reaction to most of what I was telling her about our family life was a smile and the occasional laugh.  It felt good to hear her laugh.  I can't wait to get her home and really get her going.

I told her that my boys like to wrestle and they don’t hit or kick…at least not in front of me.  We talked about dancing and singing in the kitchen, trying to plant a garden, my dog with bad breath who likes to lick your face, eating dessert first before dinner, going out to eat, picking apples, oranges, and strawberries, that Lisa and I both have jobs, and that Tyler puts his clothes in pile.  Right next to the hamper.  It’s amazing how close to the hamper they actually are, but they don’t quite make it in.  I love him just the same.

Towards the end of my talk about our family, I told her that we want to help as many children here as we can so we are sharing their stories and pictures.  I told her we pray for her every night…and her friends.  I told her thank you for listening to me talk about our family.  She replied, “Спасибо.”

We were walking up to the car and I had a few more things to say.  I told her we will take care of her and we love her very much.  I wish I had a video recorder to capture the look on her face.  It warmed my heart and I had to give her a hug.  As Lisa was getting her good bye hug, she told Sophia again, “Я люблю тебя.”  This time Sophia said, “Я то же.”  Which loosely translated means, me too.

Welcoming committee!

Look out world, here they come!

As it turns out, 11:30pm on the east coast is 6:30am Simferopol time, which is when we (read just Mike) get up to boil the water for my morning instant cup of coffee.  I’m so over the Starbucks Via packs.  They work, but it ain’t the same.  First world problem…that you could solve if you bring a French press as they have ground coffee in the stores.  Enough about my coffee woes.  I point out the time as that is when the children were due to arrive in Raleigh.  So I was hungry for pictures of the children, both for me and Sophia.  Well their flight from Detroit was delayed 40 minutes.  Now I know how some of y’all feel when I don’t update the blog at the same time.  The anticipation was killing me.  Couple that with an internet connection that makes waiting for a fax seem fast.  Thankfully, about an hour later the pictures started coming in.  Thank you to Janice for taking these photos.  It looks like they put sweaters on for their flights.  They won’t use those for another 3 weeks until they return.  It’s hot in Raleigh!  In any case, I wish all the host families and the children good luck and we’re praying for y’all.  Please post pictures on FB, or send me emails with them at txnhoki@gmail.com.

The smiles are genuine, because they don't know someone is taking their picture!

Now, for today’s visit with Sophia.  Remember today is shower day, so that takes up a good portion of our visit.  Actually today, it took up almost all of it.  We did get to see her for about 15 minutes early on and show her the pictures from last night’s arrival.  She pointed out Lera who was adopted from Losovoye a little over a year ago and said she had received a call from her, but then didn’t give much more detail other than that.  She did lift her head and smile when she said it though.  I’ll take it.  We also had a bunch of pictures of Nastya that we had received by email and she was smiling looking through those too.  The change in Nastya over one year is amazing.  These children are underweight, almost to the point of unhealthy.  No, not almost, it is unhealthy.  Your body cannot fight off infection if it does not have the reserves to begin with.  And to be constantly fighting off some new disease is draining on the body and it needs resources to survive, even more so to grow.  Think of a daycare in winter.  Illnesses spread through a daycare with all the cleaning and sanitizing solution available.  Now take that same illness and chuck it into an environment that does not see the same standard.  The poor children don’t stand a chance.  That was pretty much the extent of our visit with Sophia.  She grabbed her shower bag and headed off to the showers.  We walked with her for a little bit and stopped at the park.

We spent the rest of our time today playing with the children.  I got to play soccer with Dima, Vanya, Maxim, Ivan, Axtem, Kolya, and I think Vishay.  I’m exhausted as they would rotate in and out and I had to keep playing.  It was worth it as I have water and fruit back in our apartment.  They have to wait for lunch.  Most of the boys I played with today were older.  By older I’m guessing they are 14-15 years old.  They are close to “graduating” out of the orphanage and hopefully headed to technical school to learn a trade.  My guess is tech school is a huge wakeup call and they get overwhelmed with trying to learn with nobody hanging over them.  It wasn’t easy for me when I went to college and I was 18.  Imagine a 16-17 year old with limited to no resources now having to make it on their own.  I wonder if there is a halfway house where these guys (and girls) can find support and encouragement.  Might be something worth noodling, though I think I’ll put it on the back burner for now as I’ve got a lot on my plate.

Lisa spent her day playing ping pong with Ala and Marina before they had to head over to the showers.  Then it was watching the soccer matches on the sideline while the children filled up our memory card with videos.  We did not get to say good bye to Sophia today as she never returned from the showers.  We walked all over, but did not feel it was our place to go near the showers, plus we didn’t exactly know where they were.  We felt a little empty not getting to see her one last time.

Over the next few days I am going to start introducing her to her brothers.  What they like, don’t like, how they play, what they have said about her, to try and get her warmed up to the idea of having brothers.  Plus, being the only girl, can be a bit scary I would imaging.  Good thing Lera called.  That’s definitely something they will both have in common.