Let go and let God

So I create a title for this blog of "Follow Me!", and now we get to see how well we can follow Him. Today we found out that another American family is talking with, playing with, and in general trying to woo Vova enough to say yes to being adopted by them. I can't tell you the mix of emotions going through us. We are elated that someone out there has heard the cry of orphans and opened up their hearts and home to adopting a child. The flip side is, why our little Vova. We are soooo close to hearing back from the SDA about an appointment date, which will most likely be 3-4 weeks out. Selfishly, I want him. The father in me can't wait to take him hiking or for a ride on the Harley. I also know why this family is pursuing him. He is that captivating, adorable, handsome, intelligent, playful, and desperate for love of a family. I keep running the story of King Solomon through my head from 1 Kings 3:16-28. Now we aren't talking about splitting Vova with a sword, but I would rather him have the love of a family, than to have to live in the orphanage.

It is easy to say, God's will be done, but this hurts right now. I have asked for prayers, but I'm not sure what for. I have prayed each morning that God would answer the prayers of the orphans. He just might be doing that. Be careful what you ask for. We are not just sitting back through this. Our facilitator in the Ukraine has been working on our behalf to encourage Vova to have patience. We are going to be making a phone call, maybe even a Skype video call, tonight to remind Vova how much we love him, miss him, and are coming for him soon. You just have to endure no heat, cold showers, no privacy, minimal attention, no possessions, and limited companionship for about another month. He's an 8 year old boy living as an orphan...I know what I would do. I don't blame him, I love him.

Nonetheless, we have had this boy in our hearts, prayers, blessings before meals, wallpapers and screensavers for the last 7 months. It will not be that easy to let go.

God you have pulverized my heart over the last year. Lord I ask for comfort and guidance. I thank you for the abundant family you have blessed us with. I thank you for having given us the time we had with Vova and if you give him to the other family, you will have blessed two families with one orphan. The glory is yours, but I am struggling right now and desperately need your comfort.